It's been awhile. Actually, it's been 7 years since you last looked at me, and took your final breath. It's been 7 years since I was last able to tell you directly that I love you, and it's been 7 years since I was last able to hold your hand.
It's been 7 years Dad. I can't believe how fast time has gone by, and yet how it's seemed to sit still.
You know about the twins, as I am sure they are up there pestering you (Revenge?) and I know you know about Liam too, because of course you peek down to check up on us all when you get a chance.
I know Mom misses you a lot. I can see it, especially when something goes 'wrong' and she looks for you to fix it, but you're not here. I do my best, but she's still not convinced that I am a good 'stand-in'.
That damn dog you got, take your pick of either one. I know that you know about them too. Jake's hips are hurting him I think, and Jill, she's just a royal pain in the ass, but you never really got to see that side of her, so, yeah...
I've gained weight too, Dad. A good bit. I look healthy (Ok, I look slightly over weight now, but I think that's better then I was right?) I feel healthier, but it isn't who, or what, I'm used to seeing in the mirror, so not sure I love it.
Time, it sucks. I miss you so much, and when I woke up this morning, I couldn't believe that 7 years have gone, and just HOW much has happened.
So tonight, in a little while, to be honest, because I take every opportunity to remember you, and have a moment where I think you're with me, I'll have a shot of Akvavit, and toast you, your life, and your memory. (and as usual, Mom will refuse a shot, but that's ok, she never liked the stuff anyway. It was bad enough when it was just June 21st, now every equinox, solstice, fathers day, birthday, anniversary and today I take a moment to have one...and she will usually say no, except on June 21st...)
I love you Dad. I miss you, but I know you're taking care of Julian and Tristian until I (and Jeff) get there, so it's ok. I can't wait to see you again though, when it's the right time.
5 comments:
Miss him too, even though I never got to met the man directly. Though I had the chance.
Seeing things around me everyday lets me know him in some small way, and see that part of him that resides in you as well.
Love ya!
((HUGS)) I have so much I could say, but as the tears burn my eyes I am at a loss for words.
i really, really know what you are going through and your post really brought tears to my eyes as i thought of my daddy (it was 10 years on october 1st). big (((hugs))).
I wish I knew what to say. Just know that I love you and I have had enough experiences to say that I KNOW with my whole heart that the people we love are still with us. They miss us just as we miss them and someday we'll all have a wonderful reunion! ((Hugs))
((hugs)) for you iiri. i don't think i could say it better than jeff did so i won't try, but i am certain that the people you love never really leave you.
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